Month: April 2014

Don’t Judge My Something, Please

I have no mascara. It’s a long complicated story that I don’t want to get into, but the last week I’ve been out in the world with bare eyelashes. Not since I was old enough to legally drive a car has this occurred. To you, this is no big deal. For me, well—I’m blogging about it, aren’t I? When I was a teenager, my...

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Down by the Riverside

There were too many people. The pews were stuffed, the back of the church filled with overflow. So when it came time for communion, even despite the use of three stations that moved more swiftly than if all had kneeled at the altar, the line of people outlasted the prepared hymns. Silence. Shuffling feet. One or two wayward notes trilling from...

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The Good Friday Toad

I peaked too early. After this difficult Lent, I’m ready for Easter. Yet, blocking the road to resurrection, sitting there as unattractive as a big green toad, burps Good Friday. As I stand in this place staring at the toad and kicking the dust, I do not see Easter as “The Greatest Story Ever Told.” I see it as the most common...

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I Already Knew I Liked Wine

Someone posts a photo of her beloved pet, and I weep. Someone posts a photo of a great flash mob, and I weep. Someone posts a quote, and I weep. I believe I’m ready for Lent to be over. I don’t think I’m put together for an extended period of intentional deprivation. I’m MUCH better at deprivation over which I have no...

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You Won’t Know – Do It Anyway

I was flipping channels, and I stopped on a little girl explaining her science project. She wanted to assist water conservation. Specifically, she wanted to make her fellow and sister elementary school students aware of water use. She had the idea to tell them, whenever a faucet was running, to make a noise in their heads. “Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,”...

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Palm Sunday Bait and Switch

I have a complaint: why is the celebration that gives Palm Sunday its name so short? What is it about our theological bent toward the difficulty of the passion that we can’t celebrate the world’s recognition of Jesus for more than ten minutes before we must plunge into the hard part? Do we worship suffering and difficulty so totally...

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It Will Be Normal

For those who read my blog yesterday: I am better. As is its want, the pain is gone, leaving me to wonder what I was complaining so about yesterday. From here forward, I will live a good, fun life. I’ll do my PT exercises, impressed with myself for what I CAN do. I’ll walk the dog, forgetting this once caused pain. I’ll roll my...

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The Dispassionate Dead

Today, the pain arrived on a beautiful Saturday morning when spring had finally peeped around the corner, and I was exulting in the joy of life. When the doctor has told you, “If you said ‘now,’ I’d have you in the OR tomorrow replacing both hips,” the pain can descend at any moment. Problem is, each time, the pain...

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